Img_0380_2Posting from Fairfax, VA just outside of DC . . .
First let me say, this is a total arrogant rant, so let me pre-apologize profusely to my East Coast brothers and sisters.  As I KNOW people make fun of the "Left Coast" and San Francisco, so I expect that no one will be too offended.
So on to why Bruce thinks the East coast, well . . . not San Francisco.

#1 HUMIDITY :: The only image that came into my head when I arrived at 10:00pm last night was "Air Sponge" and it wasn’t even that humid.  Then the weather-lady this morning warned about the humidity causing moisture on the windshields so everyone should "Watch Out!"  Okay, so I know we have fog in SF, but you can SEE fog, it is a tangible enemy.  Humidity is like this invisible demon sent out into humanity to suck out energy, sweat and all feelings of being clean.  I can’t WAIT to perform the wedding in my black robe tomorrow.

# 2 DUNKIN’ DOUGHNUTS :: I don’t even know where to begin. 

  • COFFEE: Hmmmm . . .  can anyone say, "Brown Water" plus they put the cream in FOR you . . . what’s up with that?!?!?!? 
  • DOUGH NUTS:  Not all that good . . . still ate two 🙁
  • WIRELESS: The look of "Are you from another planet you teched-out, work-a-colic freak boy!" from everyone or at least that’s what I inferred from the looks.
  • CROWD: It took all my heart to not ask the line of 10 people, "So why are you here again?  I mean, I am a tourist and couldn’t find a Starbuck’s, Pete’s or local Cafe, but you LIVE here, what’s up with that?"

Okay, that’s really it . . . lovely place really, lots of those green things called trees and such.  And just keep in mind that, in the end I am just a weather-wimpy, coffee-snobby, boy from San Francisco.

Hope you are laughing a LITTLE bit.

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