Below is a chapter from Rule #2: Don’t Be an Asshat: An Official Handbook for Raising Parents and Children. Over time we will be posting most of the book, though, should this inspire you to buy a copy, we would not be offended 🙂 Posted chapters can be found in the Table of Contents.


Rule #47: Talk about the sex (Mom)

Ahhh, the sex. Whether or not I chose to talk to you about it, you would learn about it, and given how ubiquitous it is in TV and movies, surely sooner than I did. Sex is important and can bring great emotional and physical joy or pain. It is a basic human need and is at least as important as pooping, and in the early years, we talked to you a lot about that.

So let’s talk about sex—again.

I have thought it was important for us to talk about sex, too, in age-appropriate ways. I started when you were young when you asked questions about where babies came from. Despite my own initial discomfort, I’ve actually used the words “sex,” “penis,” “vagina,” and “breasts” with you—Although we are not above using euphemisms for comedic effect. Balls!—so by the time you hit puberty and the discussions became more important, we already had some shared context.

“Must we talk about this again?” Yes, before you can read that last Twilight novel. Yes, before you go to high school. Yes, after you get your period. Yes, after almost any TV show or movie. Because society has exposed you to so many unhealthy examples of sexual relationships, I want you to develop an understanding of what is healthy or unhealthy. I want you to understand contraception so you can choose when you want to have a baby, and I want you to avoid HIV and other STDs.

I want sex to be a source of joy to your life and your spirit, and for you to gain understanding, we must talk about it.

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